When I went to my dad, I was ashamed to ask him for money, knowing he's helped me numerous times this year financially. I never wanted to disappoint him but I felt as though I always let him down every time he sees that I struggle and can't seem to keep my business running. I didn't want him to become ashamed of me because I seem like the child who always turns to him for help and can't be independantly strong; and I never wanted to burn that bridge with him to make him feel as if he was being taken advantage of.
But somehow, though all those feelings rise up in me every time I ask him for money, it still surprises me that each time, he never makes me feel any of those bad things. He never made me feel as if I was asking of him too much or annoyed that I needed his help again. I love my dad and it just filled my heart with so much joy and gratitude that no matter how many times I ask of him for anything, he never questions me or even hesitates, but gives with encouragement and words of support. I know I shouldn't be surprised of his loving ways; but it amazes me to see a man who is able to love his child as God loves his children.
And when I told him how grateful I was for all of his help, he smiled with a shrug and said, "Well, I'm your dad, it's my job and that's what I do. I'm supposed to look out for you."
Those words stayed with me all day and it just reopened my eyes to the most important things I had forgotten.
I remember even before I was adopted, God was with me all throughout my youth and all throughout my journeys in life. As He is my spiritual Father, I believe He always uses my dad to show me that no matter what I need and what kind of trouble I'm in, it's always okay to ask Him for help and to turn to Him for anything.
Then I remembered, that it's not by wisdom, by strength nor by deed, does a man acquire favor from God. Niether do a man need to show himself worthy or have the desire to do good in life to recieve God's help. All a man needs is the willingness to turn to God and have faith, that no matter what situation, tribulation, or trials he faces, God will always help him. There truly is no trouble so great and no disaster so tragic that a man is unable to turn to God for help.
Even if the suffering was caused on himself, a man is still able to turn to God at any time and ask. For, a Father loves His children... He cares for them, even the most prodical ones. Though a man finds himself sinking in foolishness, irresponsibility and deep turmoil, he is still able to turn to God the moment he becomes willing.
I thank God for reminding me through my dad's example of what it means to have faith in a Father's Love.
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