Thursday, March 6th, 2008, 4:55 pm
Another week, another true "marketing" task: shooting a magazine ad for Dial Yogurt Body Wash.
And I have to say, although I've liked Carol Alt from the beginning, my respect for her increased tenfold this week. Such a class act -- hard worker, straight shooter, you name it -- especially compared to what's-her-name.
Lesson One: Lead with your strengths. As Piers Morgan mentioned, this task could have been scripted for Carol, what with her supermodel background and all. She knew exactly what she was doing, and everybody stepped out of her way and let her lead.
And her confidence in that role was downright inspirational. No hemming and hawing, no hair-twisting "what do you guys think" discussions -- just straight "here's what needs to be done, and here's who needs to do it." An example to women everywhere.
It was good to see the guys giving her the respect she so clearly earned.
Lesson Two: Opinions are not market research. Both teams made the same mistake, but from different directions: assuming their own preferences mirrored their audience's.
Team Hydra put a "pure sex" shot in the final page of the ad and offended at least one of the Dial executives. Had the other team's photo essay not been weaker overall, that might have cost them.
Team Empresario, on the other hand, was riddled with uninformed opinions. "How often do you see a shot like [the shirtless Trace Adkins] in Redbook magazine," asked Stephen Baldwin.
Good question. It deserved a quantitative answer, not just the uninformed, biased assumption Stephen rammed down Tito Ortiz's throat based on his own personal "family values." (Note that the topless female model posed no such problem for Stephen.)
If you're looking to appeal to an audience, you have to get into their mindset, regardless of whether it fits your own.
Lesson Three: Youth and good looks are no match for age and treachery. Yes, I know, I'm repeating myself (see week 1), but it's reared its head again. Tito may be a smart, tough guy, but his youth and inexperience showed when dealing with the "strong personalities" of the older contenders, namely Omarosa and Stephen Baldwin.
Baldwin was his usual overbearing self, while Omarosa deliberately railroaded Tito, first by pressing the PM job on him (after Trump warned the teams the project manager would be the most likely to be fired), then by throwing him under the bus in the board room.
To his credit, Tito put up a fight for a good, long while. But eventually he gave the "whatever" response that Omarosa seems to excel at eliciting from opponents (from everybody but Carol Alt).
And I hated to see it happen to such a nice guy.
MY FAVORITE MOMENTS:
* "Hop in the bed, please." Now there's some sexual harassment I could stand.
* Trace Adkins posing shirtless with his guitar. See Favorite Moment #1.
* "Lady O" showing her weasel tendencies by claiming the PM job only until Donald Trump said it was a firing risk, then shoving it onto Tito. Yeah, you showed your true colors, girlfriend.
THE FIRED APPRENTICE'S CHARITY: St. Jude's Children's Research Hospital <http://www.stjude.org>
THE WINNING PM'S CHARITY: The Tony Alt Memorial Foundation <http://www.tamfi.org/>
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Friday, February 22nd, 2008, 11:48 am
With the reconstructed Hydra and Empresario separating Omarosa and Piers Morgan, things calmed down considerably. And, again, the task was a true selling task, not just a "break out the Rolodex" one.
But I really, really, REALLY hate that Marilu Henner got sent home! For the most part, we're getting down to the cream of the crop (with a couple of exceptions), and seeing people fired is getting harder and harder. For me, anyway.
Lesson One: "Passionate" is not the new "smart." If I had a buck for every time the words "passion" or "passionate" got tossed around in Episode 8, I could retire. But Hydra's downfall turned out to be what they, initially, thought was their greatest strength: their "passion" for the product.
If passion is fuel, then Marilu is definitely high test rocket propellant. It's no wonder she's a great salesperson.
But what tripped Hydra up was something much more cold-blooded: facts. They didn't dig for the proven selling strategy that Stephen found (the Easy-Pay installment plan).
Hydra's lower sales figures are probably attributable to a combination of that factual omission and an overexcited Marilu as pitchperson. Correcting the former error might have overcome the latter one.
Passion may be fuel, but reason is the engine. One without the other is no good.
Lesson Two: Sometimes, winging it is a good idea. I groaned out loud when Stephen decided not to rehearse Trace for his segment. Every fiber of my being agreed with Omarosa's assessment (which should have been a red flag in and of itself).
But I was wrong. Stephen called it. Trace let himself be led in "the dance" by his co-host and turned in a really good on-air performance.
Lesson Three: Perception is reality. One of the deleted scenes I wish had made it into the show features a pre-firing conversation between Marilu and Lennox Lewis. Lennox asks Marilu who performed various tasks (getting props, directing cameras, etc.), and she just draws a blank.
Turns out Lennox did a lot of "behind the scenes" work that Marilu didn't see (or credited to Carol).
Lennox may have contributed more than she or Piers gave him credit for. But all anyone remembers is Lennox "Sleepy Boy" Lewis yawning his way through the morning.
And that "perception" -- however inaccurate and whoever's fault it was -- is what landed him on the firing line.
MY FAVORITE MOMENTS:
* Piers' cool response to The Donald's goading re: "Aren't you happy I separated you from Omarosa?" -- "Whatever. That was yesterday."
* The Donald chiding Piers for nicknaming (or as Trump put it, "insulting") Lennox as "Sleepy Boy." Remember how Trump said not one word to Omarosa about her obscenities-laced insults to Piers last week? This inconsistency is what my mother used to refer to as "hitting a gnat with a hammer and letting the elephant run wild."
* Steve (the QVC co-host) gently trying to get Marilu to shut up and let the call-in guest talk.
THE FIRED APPRENTICE'S CHARITY: The Physician's Committee For Responsible Medicine <http://www.pcrm.org/>
THE WINNING PM'S CHARITY: Carol M. Baldwin Breast Cancer Research Fund <http://www.findacure.org/>
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Thursday, February 21st, 2008, 12:11 pm
I've just noticed something -- there's this pink (silk?) tie that's being passed around the various men this season. Donald Trump's worn it, Tito Ortiz wore it in Episode 6, Piers Morgan wore it in Episode 4 ...
I suppose I could go back through the episodes and see who else has had it, but ... that's just way too much television to re-watch.
Is it a signal? Does it mean something?
Or do I just not have enough to keep me busy?
But I'll be watching for it tonight and for the rest of the season.
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Tuesday, February 19th, 2008, 2:30 pm
I thought the two-hour "Vinnie as rat" extravaganza was hard to watch, but "Omarosa vs. Piers" episode was downright brutal. (Thank God it was only an hour.) The phrase "beyond the pale" pretty much summed it up.
But there are always things to learn, even from the ugliest spectacle.
Lesson One: Exploitable weaknesses can come from strengths. While I in no way endorse Omarosa's personal attacks on Piers Morgan, the general principle of using an opponent's weaknesses against him/her got a vivid demonstration in episode 7.
Interestingly, Omarosa figured out how to exploit the shadow side of two of Piers' strengths: his tenacity and his chivalry.
Piers clearly has the tenacity of a pit bull, and no doubt that has served him well in many contexts. And he's already demonstrated (even jokingly) his old-fashioned manners with his female teammates.
But strengths have shadow sides. And Omarosa knows a thing or two about shadows.
She knew, once she picked a fight with Piers (the "typo" was just the bait), he wouldn't disengage from her, even when it was in his (and the team's) best interest to do so. And she knew she could even provoke him physically without risking bodily harm.
Reprehensible ... but effective.
Lesson Two: Never play the gender card. As a woman, I found Omarosa's exploitation of Piers' chivalry (see above) particularly offensive.
If we expect a level playing field, we have to play by the same rules as the guys. No fair using our gender as an excuse for poor performance or unprofessional conduct.
The rest of us "business broads" need to stand up and disown this kind of behavior. It doesn't serve any of us well.
Lesson Three: The just will have their reward. Trace Adkins & Co., on the other hand, were a joy to watch. Marilu Henner, Tito Ortiz, and Stephen Baldwin brought their "A" game, and their energy and enthusiasm were infectious.
I still can't believe they didn't make more money than the other team, as hard as they were working.
Ivanka Trump nailed it when she said, "Sometimes the winner isn't who you want them to be."
But sometimes exceptional character gets the attention of even "it's all about the money" people like Donald Trump.
MY FAVORITE MOMENTS:
* Ivanka visibly flinching at the string of profanities Piers quotes as having come from Omarosa's mouth. Yes, honey, Daddy actually admires this woman.
* Team Empresario refusing to throw any teammates to the wolves by naming any sub-par performers. Class!
* The Donald "feeling charitable." Awwwww!
THE LOSING PM'S CHARITY: Food Allergy & Anaphylaxis Network <http://www.foodallergy.org/>
THE WINNING PM'S CHARITY: The Intrepid Fallen Heroes Fund <http://www.fallenheroesfund.org/>
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Friday, February 8th, 2008, 5:06 pm
Well, the girls lost again. But at least we got a challenge this week -- creating a "living window" advertisement for the new Vera Wang/Sealy mattress -- that didn't scream "break out your Rolodex."
For once, we get to see who's got marketing smarts ... and who doesn't.
And even though each team's MO is starting to become a little predictable, new lessons keep cropping up.
Lesson One: Leadership is not the same as lordship (and, yes, even democracies need leaders). Up til now, we've enjoyed watching the two least macho Hydra teammates (Piers Morgan and Stephen Baldwin) duel for the alpha male position. Now, we're seeing the two toughest guys (Lennox Lewis and Tito Ortiz) becoming more and more afraid of the sound of their own voices.
It's tough to say which spectacle is funnier.
Lennox takes his turn at the PM job for Hydra, and hilarity ensues, in the form of the most bizarre management style I've ever seen. He can't decide anything without a vote. He provides no discernible direction about anything. And his discussion facilitation method is right out of elementary school.
What's next -- pairing the guys off to hold hands to cross the street?
Meanwhile, Piers takes the lead in coaxing the client into giving the team solid creative direction (more on that later). And Trace Adkins comes up with yet another killer concept.
Lennox, on the other hand, seems to think that leadership means all perks and no work.
Um ... no, sweetie.
Lesson Two: Clients need help figuring out what they want ... lots of help. In the boardroom, Omarosa insisted was that she and the rest of Empresario asked the same questions of Wang & Co. as Hydra did.
So how did Empresario go so totally wrong?
Piers seems to have a real knack for sifting the wheat from the chaff in client meetings and forcing clients to commit to an idea. So much so, in fact, that the Kodak people (sponsors of a prior task) made special note of it in their internal critique (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oH4VArhLqjc).
Omarosa, on the other hand, goes into meetings with preconceived notions and doesn't do nearly as much digging.
And, not surprisingly, she doesn't get nearly as creative a result, either.
Lesson Three: Don't make big decisions in the heat of emotion. Poor Stephen. Such an emotional guy. Clearly, this is someone who thinks more with his gut than his head.
But he let the post-boardroom furor get to him and immediately rushed back into Mr. Trump's presence to quit (just like Vinny Pastore had done a few moments before).
Stephen would have been far better served to take his upcoming "day off" (traveling for a speaking engagement) to distance himself from the nastiness and think things over. Instead, he ended up in an even worse position than before.
Makes you wonder how well he models "adulthood" to all those teenagers he ministers to.
MY FAVORITE MOMENTS:
* Lennox Lewis's, um, interesting way of "breaking" the tension within Hydra.
* Omarosa pleading with The Donald not to make her name two teammates to bring back to the boardroom. (Chink in the armor, darling?)
* Piers' decidedly un-PC crack that Omarosa's job at the White House involved cleaning (paging Dr. House?).
THE FIRED APPRENTICE'S CHARITY: Count Me In <http://www.countmein.org>
THE WINNING PM'S CHARITY: The Muhammad Ali Center http://www.alicenter.org>
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